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Job Application - Posted on 2007-02-10 17:22:45

ohsomadeddie
1300cc Superstar

Joined:
Monday, June 27, 2005
Posts: 705
Location:
bottom of a newki broon bottle
United Kingdom

This is an actual job application someone submitted to McDonald's. They hired him. NAME - Greg Bulmash DESIRED POSITION - Reclining. Ha ha. But seriously, whatever's available. If I was in a position to be picky, I wouldn't be applying here in the first place. DESIRED SALARY - $185,000 a year plus stock options and a Michael Ovitz style severance package. If that's not possible, make an offer and we can haggle. EDUCATION - Yes. LAST POSITION HELD - Target for middle management hostility. SALARY - Less than I'm worth. MOST NOTABLE ACHIEVEMENT - My incredible collection of stolen pens and post-it notes. REASON FOR LEAVING - It sucked. HOURS AVAILABLE TO WORK - Any. PREFERRED HOURS - 1:30 - 3:30 pm, Monday, Tuesday, and Thursday. DO YOU HAVE ANY SPECIAL SKILLS? Yes, but they're better suited to a more intimate environment. MAY WE CONTACT YOUR CURRENT EMPLOYER? If I had one, would I be here? DO YOU HAVE ANY PHYSICAL CONDITIONS THAT WOULD PROHIBIT YOU FROM LIFTING UP TO 50 LBS? Of what? DO YOU HAVE A CAR? I think the more appropriate question here would be, ''Do you have a car that runs?'' HAVE YOU RECEIVED ANY SPECIAL AWARDS OR RECOGNITION? I may already be a winner of the Publisher's Clearinghouse Sweepstakes. DO YOU SMOKE? Only when set on fire. WHAT WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE DOING IN FIVE YEARS? Living in the Bahamas with a fabulously wealthy supermodel who thinks I'm the greatest thing since sliced bread. Actually, I'd like to be doing that now. DO YOU CERTIFY THAT THE ABOVE IS TRUE AND COMPLETE TO THE BEST OF YOUR KNOWLEDGE? No, but I dare you to prove otherwise. SIGN HERE: Scorpio with Libra rising.

Replies


	Job Application - Posted on 2007-02-10 17:33:56
daisyduke 1300cc Superstar Joined: Saturday, February 04, 2006 Posts: 4574 Location: Bolton United Kingdom	looks like one of my latest applications lol

	Job Application - Posted on 2007-02-10 17:55:47
ohsomadeddie 1300cc Superstar Joined: Monday, June 27, 2005 Posts: 705 Location: bottom of a newki broon bottle United Kingdom	you worked for mcdonalds? pmsl

	Job Application - Posted on 2007-02-10 18:48:59
daisyduke 1300cc Superstar Joined: Saturday, February 04, 2006 Posts: 4574 Location: Bolton United Kingdom	oh nooooooo, not that there is anything wrong in that but definitely not a job for me, cant stand processed food

	Job Application - Posted on 2007-02-10 18:51:38
ohsomadeddie 1300cc Superstar Joined: Monday, June 27, 2005 Posts: 705 Location: bottom of a newki broon bottle United Kingdom	i would hate it too but i love mcdonalds double quarter pounder

	Job Application - Posted on 2007-02-10 18:53:32
daisyduke 1300cc Superstar Joined: Saturday, February 04, 2006 Posts: 4574 Location: Bolton United Kingdom	tis bad for you ya know, all that fat and salt lol

	Job Application - Posted on 2007-02-10 18:55:42
ohsomadeddie 1300cc Superstar Joined: Monday, June 27, 2005 Posts: 705 Location: bottom of a newki broon bottle United Kingdom	yeah but its lovely when you go to bristol you can get a 3/4 pounder BIG burger even i struggled with it

	Job Application - Posted on 2007-02-10 23:43:14
bear 1300cc Superstar Joined: Friday, October 29, 2004 Posts: 5790 Location: cumbria United Kingdom	dble quarter pounder with cheese is fab...... seen this before..wouldnt surprise me if it was true...but then how many folk actually apply seriously to maccy d's.................. aplied once to em but they dont like tatoo's!

	Job Application - Posted on 2007-02-11 17:30:53
hagasan 600cc Boy Racer Joined: Friday, January 05, 2007 Posts: 125 Location: cleveland United Kingdom	I"v seen something like that before, guy wanted to be a brickie , or maybe not

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