View forum thread

Welcome Visitor, Please Login, you have 0 new personal messages

tesco letter.... - Posted on 2007-02-08 16:15:16

bear
1300cc Superstar

Joined:
Friday, October 29, 2004
Posts: 5790
Location:
cumbria
United Kingdom

nicked from another forum. This letter was recently sent by Tesco's Head Office to a customer in Oxford: Dear Mrs. Murray, While we thank you for your valued custom and use of the Tesco Loyalty Card, the Manager of our store in Banbury is considering banning you and your family from shopping with us, unless your husband stops his antics. Below is a list of offences over the past few months all verified by our surveillance cameras: 1. June 15: Took 24 boxes of condoms and randomly put them in people's trolleys when they weren't looking. 2. July 2: Set all the alarm clocks in Housewares to go off at 5-minute intervals. 3. July 7: Made a trail of tomato juice on the floor leading to feminine products aisle. 4. July 19: Walked up to an employee and told her in an official tone, "Code 3" in housewares..... and watched what happened. 5. August 14: Moved a 'CAUTION - WET FLOOR' sign to a carpeted area. 6. September 15: Set up a tent in the outdoor clothing department and told shoppers he'd invite them in if they would bring sausages and a Calor gas stove. 7. September 23: When the Deputy Manager asked if she could help him, he began to cry and asked, "Why can't you people just leave me alone?" 8. October 4: Looked right into the security camera; used it as a mirror, picked his nose, and ate it. 9. November 10: While appearing to be choosing kitchen knives in the Housewares aisle asked an assistant if he knew where the antidepressants were. 10. December 3: Darted around the store suspiciously, loudly humming the "Mission Impossible" theme. 11. December 6: In the kitchenware aisle, practised the "Madonna look" using different size funnels. 12. December 18: Hid in a clothing rack and when people browsed, yelled "PICK ME!" "PICK ME!" 13. December 21: When an announcement came over the loud speaker, assumed the foetal position and screamed "NO! NO! It's those voices again." And; last, but not least: 14. December 23: Went into a fitting room, shut the door, waited awhile; then yelled, very loudly, "There is no toilet paper in here." Yours sincerely, Charles Brown Store Manager

Replies


	tesco letter.... - Posted on 2007-02-08 16:43:54
ana 1300cc Superstar Joined: Monday, February 20, 2006 Posts: 1299 Location: colchester United Kingdom	pmsl, classic , may even try some of them lol

	tesco letter.... - Posted on 2007-02-08 16:45:01
hagasan 600cc Boy Racer Joined: Friday, January 05, 2007 Posts: 125 Location: cleveland United Kingdom	nice one ,done the changing room one .

	tesco letter.... - Posted on 2007-02-08 16:55:46
Roeby 1300cc Superstar Joined: Posts: 8884 Location: Derbyshire United Kingdom	fantastic!!!!!!!!! lol

	tesco letter.... - Posted on 2007-02-08 17:14:37
daisyduke 1300cc Superstar Joined: Saturday, February 04, 2006 Posts: 4574 Location: Bolton United Kingdom	roflmao, pure classics, must tell Phil to stop shopping in Oxford lol

Hosted by