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Story! - Posted on 2006-12-25 22:11:22

Bigsmoky
250cc Rider

Joined:
Monday, January 17, 2005
Posts: 46
Location:
Hades
United Kingdom

I thought this was hilarious! Its a bit long but worth reading. the Lazy Grasshopper REST OF THE WORLD VERSION: The squirrel works hard in the sweltering heat all summer long, building and improving his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the squirrel is warm and well fed. The shivering grasshopper has no food or shelter, so he dies out in the cold. THE END *************************************************** THE BRITISH VERSION : The squirrel works hard in the sweltering heat all summer long, building his house and laying up supplies for the winter. The grasshopper thinks he's a fool, and laughs and dances and plays the summer away. Come winter, the squirrel is warm and well fed. A passing social worker finds the shivering grasshopper, calls a press conference and demands to know why the squirrel should be allowed to be warm and well fed while others less fortunate, like the grasshopper, are cold and starving. The BBC shows up to provide live coverage of the shivering grasshopper; with cuts to a video of the squirrel in his comfortable warm home with a table laden with food. The British press inform people that they should be ashamed that in a country of such wealth, this poor grasshopper is allowed to suffer so, while others have plenty. The Labour Party, Greenpeace, Animal Rights and The Grasshopper Council of GB demonstrate in front of the squirrel's house. The BBC, interrupting a cultural festival special from Notting Hill with breaking news, broadcasts a multi cultural choir singing "We Shall Overcome". Ken Livingstone rants in an interview with Trevor McDonald that the squirrel has gotten rich off the backs of grasshoppers, and calls for an immediate tax hike on the squirrel to make him pay his "fair share" and increases the charge for squirrels to enter inner London. In response to pressure from the media, the Government drafts the Economic Equity and Grasshopper Anti Discrimination Act, retroactive to the beginning of the summer. The squirrels's taxes are reassessed. He is taken to court and fined for failing to hire grasshoppers as builders for the work he was doing on his home and an additional fine for contempt when he told the court the grasshopper did not want to work. The grasshopper is provided with a council house, financial aid to furnish it and an account with a local taxi firm to ensure he can be socially mobile. The squirrels food is seized and re distributed to the more needy members of society, in this case the grasshopper. Without enough money to buy more food, to pay the fine and his newly imposed retroactive taxes, the squirrel has to downsize and start building a new home. The local authority takes over his old home and utilises it as a temporary home for asylum seeking cats who had hijacked a plane to get to Britain as they had to share their country of origin with mice. On arrival they tried to blow up the airport because of Britains apparent love of dogs.

Replies


	Story! - Posted on 2006-12-25 22:20:26
jakethesnake 125cc Learner Joined: Friday, December 22, 2006 Posts: 17 Location: loughborough United Kingdom	lol funny :) nice one

	Story! - Posted on 2006-12-25 22:21:25
r1froog 1300cc Superstar Joined: Sunday, October 02, 2005 Posts: 4352 Location: aberdeen United Kingdom	hi smokie,,,,i agree,,part fae i vote labour...lol

	Story! - Posted on 2006-12-25 22:34:20
fredcbr6uk 1300cc Superstar Joined: Saturday, July 08, 2006 Posts: 513 Location: beccles United Kingdom	how true is that.

	Story! - Posted on 2006-12-26 19:00:21
Scully 1000cc Pro Racer Joined: Tuesday, May 23, 2006 Posts: 299 Location: Antrim United Kingdom	So what happens the foxes??? lol

	Story! - Posted on 2006-12-26 19:10:54
the_ox 1300cc Superstar Joined: Saturday, October 30, 2004 Posts: 8803 Location: London United Kingdom	The banned huntsmen got them in a midnight swoop. How shite is that they have banned hunting.............!!! cheers

	Story! - Posted on 2006-12-26 20:16:06
r1froog 1300cc Superstar Joined: Sunday, October 02, 2005 Posts: 4352 Location: aberdeen United Kingdom	oxo if u wanna hunt,come up here and hunt sheep...scunj will teach ya.... :)

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