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oops - Posted on 2006-09-17 16:44:07

the_ox
1300cc Superstar

Joined:
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Posts: 8803
Location:
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The Scottish Executive Education Committee has determined that different Secondary Maths Exam papers are required for pupils in Edinburgh and Glasgow. Below are the most recent papers for your reference. MATHS TEST FOR SECONDARY SCHOOLS IN GLASGOW: NAME __________________________________________________ NICKNAME __________________________________________________ GANG NAME _________________________________________________ 1. Shug has 0.5 kilos of cocaine. If he sells an 8 ball to Malkie for 300 quid and 90 grams to Gozy for 90 quid a gram, what is the street value of the rest of his hold? 2. Elroy McKay pimps 3 brassers. If the price is 40 quid a shag, how many shags per day must each brasser perform to support his 500 quid a day crack habit? 3. Whacker wants to cut the kilo of cocaine he bought for 7,000 bar to make a 20% profit. How many grams of strychnine will he need? 4. Christy got 6 years for murder. He also got 350,000 for the hit. If his common law wife spends 33,100 per year, how much money will be left when he gets out? 5. If an average can of spray paint covers 22 square meters an-d the average letter is 1 square meter, how many letters can be sprayed with an eight fluid ounce can with 20% extra paint free? 6. Bagga steals Dunky's skateboard. As Bagga skates away at a speed of 35mph, Dunky loads his brother's piece. If it takes Dunky 20 seconds to load the gun, how far will Bagga have travelled when he gets whacked? MATHS TEST FOR SECONDARY SCHOOLS IN EDINBURGH: NAME ________________________________________________________________________________ ________________________________________________________________________________ _______________________________________________ (If longer, please continue on separate sheet) DADDY'S COMPANY _______________________________________ 1. Julian smashes up his old man's car, causing X amount of damage and killing three people. The old man asks his local MP to intervene in the court system, then forges his insurance claim and receives a payment of Y. The difference between X and Y is three times the life insurance settlement for the three dead people. What kind of car is Julian driving now? 2. Chloe's personal shopper decides to substitute generic and own-brand products for the designer goods favoured by her employer. In the course of a month she saves the price of a return ticket to Fiji and Chloe doesn't even notice the difference. Is she thick or what? 3. If Savannah throws up four times a day for a week she can fit into a size 8 Versace dress. If she only throws up three times a day for two weeks, she has to make do with a size 10 Dolce et Gabbana. How much does liposuction cost? 4.. Alexander is unsure about his sexuality. Three days a week he fancies women. On the other days he fancies men, ducks and vacuum cleaners. However he only has access to the Hoover every third week. When does his Sunday Independent column start?

Replies


	oops - Posted on 2006-09-17 19:02:07
hastie 750cc Boy Racer Joined: Monday, April 24, 2006 Posts: 195 Location: catterick United Kingdom	Youre a tit

	oops - Posted on 2006-09-17 19:04:48
mandi6763 1300cc Superstar Joined: Wednesday, February 09, 2005 Posts: 653 Location: Bristol United Kingdom	he knows lol

	oops - Posted on 2006-09-17 19:32:18
r1froog 1300cc Superstar Joined: Sunday, October 02, 2005 Posts: 4352 Location: aberdeen United Kingdom	glas one was brill..

	oops - Posted on 2006-09-17 20:47:32
the_ox 1300cc Superstar Joined: Saturday, October 30, 2004 Posts: 8803 Location: London United Kingdom	Awwwwwwwww, your right mand :P

	oops - Posted on 2006-09-17 21:53:27
r1froog 1300cc Superstar Joined: Sunday, October 02, 2005 Posts: 4352 Location: aberdeen United Kingdom	mind u,,so was the edinburgh one.....

	oops - Posted on 2006-09-17 22:02:05
gfisher 1300cc Superstar Joined: Tuesday, November 02, 2004 Posts: 2725 Location: Glasgow United Kingdom	oi!!! pmsl

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