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    100 Reasins why a BEER is better than a woman.... - Posted on 2005-02-16 10:00:30

exmitoman
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I just had to go one better than the 35 reasons post........... 1. You can enjoy a BEER all month. 2. BEER stains wash out. 3. You don't have to wine and dine a BEER. 4. Your BEER will always wait patiently for you in the car. 5. When BEER goes flat you toss it out. 6. BEER is never late. 7. HANGOVERS go away. 8. A BEER doesn't get jealous when you grab another BEER. 9. BEER labels come off without a fight. 10. When you go to a bar, you know you can always pick up a BEER. 11. BEER never has a headache. 12. After you have a BEER, the bottle is still worth a dime. 13. A BEER won't get upset if you come home with BEER on your breath. 14. If you pour a BEER right, you will always get good head. 15. You can have more than one BEER a night and not feel guilty. 16. A BEER ALWAYS goes down easy. 17. You can share a BEER with your friends. 18. You always know that you are the first one to pop a BEER. 19. A BEER is always wet. 20. BEER doesn't demand equality. 21. A BEER doesn't care when you come. 22. You can have a BEER in public. 23. A frigid BEER is a good BEER. 24. You don't have to wash a BEER before it tastes good. 25. BEER always comes in multiples of six. 26. BEER doesn't mind being in the "wet spot" that IT left. 27. You can't catch anything but a "buzz" from a BEER. 28. After you have a BEER, you're committed to nothing other than dumping the empty bottle. 29. A BEER never costs you more than five dollars and never leaves you thirsty. 30. When your BEER is gone, you just pop another. 31. You rarely (if ever) find BEER labels on the shower curtain rod. 32. BEER looks the same in the morning. 33. BEER doesn't look you up in a month. 34. BEER doesn't worry about someone walking in. 35. BEER doesn't worry about waking the kids. 36. BEER doesn't get cramps. 37. BEER doesn't have a mother. 38. BEER doesn't have morals. 39. BEER doesn't go crazy once a month. 40. BEER always listens and never argues. 41. BEER labels don't go out of style every year. 42. BEER doesn't whine, it bubbles. 43. BEER doesn't have cold hands/feet. 44. BEER doesn't demand legality. 45. BEER is never overweight. 46. If you change BEERs, you don't have to pay alimony. 47. BEER won't run off with your credit cards. 48. BEER doesn't have a lawyer. 49. BEER doesn't need much closet space. 50. BEER can't give your herpes or other nasty things. 51. BEER doesn't complain about the way you drive. 52. BEER doesn't mind if you fart or belch. 53. BEER never changes its mind. 54. BEER doesn't tease you or play hard to get. 55. BEER never asks you to change the station. 56. BEER doesn't make you go shopping. 57. BEER doesn't tell you to mow the grass. 58. BEER doesn't mind seeing Chuck Norris and Charles Bronson flicks. 59. BEER is always easy to pick up. 60. Big, fat BEERs are nice to have. 61. BEER doesn't pout or play games. 62. BEER NEVER says no. 63. BEER is easy to get into. 64. BEER never complains when you take it somewhere. 65. BEER doesn't need to go to the 'powder room' with other BEERs. 66. BEER doesn't wear a bra. 67. BEER doesn't mind getting dirty. 68. BEER doesn't complain about insensitivity. 69. BEER doesn't use up your toilet paper. 70. BEER doesn't live with its mother. 71. BEER doesn't blow you off. 72. BEER doesn't care if you have no culture or manners. 73. BEER doesn't bitch, yell, or cry. 74. BEER doesn't mind football season. 75. A BEER won't make you go to church. 76. A BEER is more likely to know how to spell "carburetor" than a woman. 77. A BEER doesn't think baseball is stupid simply because the guys spit. 78. A BEER doesn't think DOS is pronounced "dose". 79. A BEER doesn't give a fuck if you keep a bunch of other BEERs around. 80. A BEER will not insist that those odious Michelin commercials wit babies are "cute". 81. If a BEER leaks all over the room, it smells kinda good for a while. 82. A BEER will not call you a sexist pig if you say "doberman" instead of "doberperson". 83. A BEER won't get a job as a DJ and play 5 straight hours of lesbian folk music on your favorite radio station. 84. A BEER won't claim that the Three Stooges are shitheads. 85. A BEER won't raise a fuss about a little thing like leaving the toilet seat up. 86. If you mention a "three-hundred-fifty cubic-inch V8" around a BEER, it won't think you're talking about an enormous can of vegetable juice. 87. A BEER won't whine that seatbelts hurt. 88. A BEER won't smoke in your car. 89. A BEER won't argue that there's no difference between shooting down an unidentified aircraft in a war zone and blowing a Korean airliner out of the sky. 90. A BEER will never buy a car with automatic transmission. 91. A BEER will actually *support* belching and farting and share your enthusiasm for getting them included as demonstration sports in the 1992 Olympic Games in Barcelona. 92. A BEER is always ready to leave on time. 93. A BEER never fishes for compliments. 94. Some BEERs (e.g. St. Pauli Girl) have fabulous tits. 95. BEER tastes *good*. 96. If you take a BEER outta the fridge just to look at it but then decide to drink it, the BEER won't accuse you of "date rape". 97. A BEER won't raise any objections to an evening of watching "John Holmes' Greatest Hits" on your VCR. 98. An ice-cold BEER will nonetheless let you have your way with it. 99. A BEER won't make you pick up some tampons when you go to the grocery store. 100. A BEER won't accuse you of lying when you say you read Penthouse "just for the articles". (You *are* lying, but the BEER won't accuse you of it.) Granted some off them are lame.... just had to post it !!

 

 

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   100 Reasins why a BEER is better than a woman.... - Posted on 2005-02-16 10:18:52

Roeby
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But mito ......... a beer won't love ya a beer won't look after ya a beer won't do ya washing a beer won't do ya ironing a beer won't do ya cooking a beer won't do ya cleaning a beer won't make love to ya or on a good night ferk u to death a beer won't give u children a beer won't do the decorating a beer won't sort out your problems (long term that is) a beer won't pick up your dry cleaning a beer won't take the dog out a beer won't water the plants a beer won't look good on your arm in a nice little black dress a beer won't tell u to stop embarassing yourself a beer won't make u great in bed (usually has the opposite effect) a beer won't look after u when u have man flu or some other deadly diesase a beer won't lie for ya (yeah sorry your son hasn't been to see u but he's really busy) a beer won't call in sick for ya a beer won't go out and get a job to make ends meet i'm sure the ladies will let me know any i have missed out lol

 

   100 Reasins why a BEER is better than a woman.... - Posted on 2005-02-16 11:20:13

graz79
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but roeby.... neither does my woman!!

 

   100 Reasins why a BEER is better than a woman.... - Posted on 2005-02-16 11:36:14

scunjee
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roeby...after a few beers all ya points become null and void hun:0D

 

   100 Reasins why a BEER is better than a woman.... - Posted on 2005-02-16 11:51:01

joeboxer
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Sorry Roeby beer will decorate - iv'e decorated many a pavement with beer lol.

 

   100 Reasins why a BEER is better than a woman.... - Posted on 2005-02-16 11:58:22

Roeby
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I give up u can all drown in beer if it makes u happy but don't come crying to me when u need to go to AA meetings!!!!

 

   100 Reasins why a BEER is better than a woman.... - Posted on 2005-02-16 12:05:02

joeboxer
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and a beer won't give up Heheheehh!!!

 

   100 Reasins why a BEER is better than a woman.... - Posted on 2005-02-16 12:35:59

exmitoman
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reminds me of a joke......... Why did god invent women........... to carry semen from the bedroom to the bathroom..... hehehehe

 

   100 Reasins why a BEER is better than a woman.... - Posted on 2005-02-16 12:57:43

realslapper
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if beers so better than a women how come its makes ya go soft and women make yous go hard eh lmao

 

   100 Reasins why a BEER is better than a woman.... - Posted on 2005-02-16 14:28:46

bear
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as much as i love beer i would rather have the woman ta (tho i would also like to think i can have both)lol

 

   100 Reasins why a BEER is better than a woman.... - Posted on 2005-02-16 14:36:36

Roeby
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ok a little survey ............. if u could only have one for the rest of your life what would it be a woman or beer???

 

   100 Reasins why a BEER is better than a woman.... - Posted on 2005-02-16 14:42:46

bear
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oooooooo tough one depends on the beer or the woman really it might be really good ale and a really bad woman or vice versa. would probably go for the woman (but i would cheat and drink beer anyway)

 

   100 Reasins why a BEER is better than a woman.... - Posted on 2005-02-16 15:36:22

Roeby
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u can't cheat bear u have to pick one or the other lol

 

   100 Reasins why a BEER is better than a woman.... - Posted on 2005-02-16 17:04:36

papa
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I'm afraid I'd have to agree with Roebs here.......... I'd much rather have a woman. (but then again i am getting on a bit and may need help getting up the stairs....cant see beer helping me to do that.....in fact it does the opposite) Ian

 

   100 Reasins why a BEER is better than a woman.... - Posted on 2005-02-16 18:02:41

exmitoman
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in this survey roebs, is the beer a never ending one???

 

   100 Reasins why a BEER is better than a woman.... - Posted on 2005-02-16 20:34:28

Roeby
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its beer all day every day for the rest of your life mito OR a woman to do all of the above .............. so make your choice

 

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