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Computer Diagnosis - Posted on 2006-04-03 11:34:54

ohsomadeddie
1300cc Superstar

Joined:
Monday, June 27, 2005
Posts: 705
Location:
bottom of a newki broon bottle
United Kingdom

One day Bill complained to his friend that his elbow really hurt. His friend suggested that he go to a computer at the drug store that can diagnose anything quicker and cheaper than a doctor. ''Simply put in a sample of your urine and the computer will diagnose your problem and tell you what you can do about it. It only costs $10." Bill figured he had nothing to lose, so he filled a jar with a urine sample and went to the drug store. Finding the computer, he poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer started making some noise and various lights started flashing. After a brief pause out popped a small slip of paper on which was printed: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water. Avoid heavy lifting. It will be better in two weeks." Later that evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was and how it would change medical science forever, he began to wonder if this machine could be fooled. He mixed together some tap water, a stool sample from his dog and urine samples from his wife and daughter. To top it off, he masturbated into the concoction. He went back to the drug store, located the machine, poured in the sample and deposited the $10. The computer again made the usual noise and printed out the following message: "Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener. Your dog has worms. Get him vitamins. Your daughter is using cocaine. Put her in a rehabilitation clinic. Your wife is pregnant with twin girls. They aren't yours. Get a lawyer. And if you don't stop jerking off, your tennis elbow will never get better."

Replies


	Computer Diagnosis - Posted on 2006-04-03 14:18:51
daisyduke 1300cc Superstar Joined: Saturday, February 04, 2006 Posts: 4574 Location: Bolton United Kingdom	pmsl,not seen that one before

	Computer Diagnosis - Posted on 2006-04-03 19:03:15
rev_ 1300cc Superstar Joined: Thursday, January 13, 2005 Posts: 3068 Location: Coventry United Kingdom	lmfao! quality m8

	Computer Diagnosis - Posted on 2006-04-03 19:40:55
the_ox 1300cc Superstar Joined: Saturday, October 30, 2004 Posts: 8803 Location: London United Kingdom	Sorry dudes its a repeat.......

	Computer Diagnosis - Posted on 2006-04-03 19:54:18
rev_ 1300cc Superstar Joined: Thursday, January 13, 2005 Posts: 3068 Location: Coventry United Kingdom	some of us have lives instead of trawling joke sites......for those of us that do thanx for posting the funnies....

	Computer Diagnosis - Posted on 2006-04-03 20:15:44
daisyduke 1300cc Superstar Joined: Saturday, February 04, 2006 Posts: 4574 Location: Bolton United Kingdom	I think ohsomadeddie is trawling the same sites as me lol

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