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joke - Posted on 2007-05-29 12:54:22

The_Drifter
1300cc Superstar

Joined:
Monday, January 24, 2005
Posts: 967
Location:
Harare
Zimbabwe

One day, in the line at the works cafeteria, John says to Mike behind him"my elbow hurts like hell. I suppose I'd better see a doctor." "Listen,don't waste your time down at the surgery," Mike replies. "There's adiagnosis computer at asda. Just give it a urine sample and the computerwill tell you what's wrong, and what to do about it. It takes ten secondsand only costs five pounds....... alot quicker and better than a doctor" So John collects a urine sample in a small jar and takes it to Asda. He deposits five pounds, and the computer lights up and asks for the urinesample. He pours the sample into the slot and waits. Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a print out: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in warm water and avoid heavyactivity. It will improve in two weeks". That evening while thinking how amazing this new technology was. John beganwondering if the computer could be fooled. He mixed some tap water. a stool sample from his dog. Urine samples fromhis wife and daughter. and masturbated into the mixture for good measure.John hurried back to Asda, eager to check what would happen. He deposits five pounds. Pours in his concoction and awaits the results: 1. Your tap water is too hard. Get a water softener.2. Your dog has ringworm. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.3. Your daughter has a cocaine habit. Get her into rehab.4. Your wife is pregnant. Twins. They are not yours. Get a lawyer.5. And if you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never getbetter.................... !!!!

Replies


	joke - Posted on 2007-05-29 14:22:14
Roeby 1300cc Superstar Joined: Posts: 8884 Location: Derbyshire United Kingdom	roflmfao!!!!!!!!!!! thats brilliant!!!!!!!!!!!!

	joke - Posted on 2007-05-30 20:47:19
franonacbr 1100cc Pro Racer Joined: Sunday, July 09, 2006 Posts: 399 Location: beccles United Kingdom	pmsl. brilliant

	joke - Posted on 2007-05-30 21:04:28
fredcbr6uk 1300cc Superstar Joined: Saturday, July 08, 2006 Posts: 513 Location: beccles United Kingdom	superb !!!!!!!

	joke - Posted on 2007-05-31 10:48:57
sprag 750cc Boy Racer Joined: Saturday, March 24, 2007 Posts: 183 Location: leicester United Kingdom	hahahahahaha now go post that on MCN pub talk board...... they could do with a good laugh on there since the idiots run the show 'improved' the site.

	joke - Posted on 2007-05-31 22:07:23
count 400cc Rider Joined: Thursday, November 04, 2004 Posts: 54 Location: Somewhere! United Kingdom	I have just cracked a rib.

	joke - Posted on 2007-05-31 22:08:53
the_ox 1300cc Superstar Joined: Saturday, October 30, 2004 Posts: 8803 Location: London United Kingdom	Damn thats so old Still a goodun

	joke - Posted on 2007-06-01 00:54:24
gixxer 1300cc Superstar Joined: Tuesday, May 31, 2005 Posts: 1563 Location: sheffield United Kingdom	thats asda price!

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